{"id":11,"date":"2010-01-21T17:13:16","date_gmt":"2010-01-22T01:13:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.freemanng.net\/blog\/?p=11"},"modified":"2010-01-21T17:13:16","modified_gmt":"2010-01-22T01:13:16","slug":"anthropomorphic-alliterative-animals","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.authorfreeman.com\/blog\/anthropomorphic-alliterative-animals\/","title":{"rendered":"Anthropomorphic Alliterative Animals!"},"content":{"rendered":"

About a year ago, I attended a Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators<\/a> conference where Yolanda LeRoy, an editor with Charlesbridge Publishing, gave a very entertaining talk about the good and bad picture book manuscripts they get in their slush pile<\/a>.\u00a0 At one point, she mentioned a classically bad picture book element they often saw: “anthropomorphic alliterative animals”.<\/p>\n

I immediately began jotting down lines for a poem that would illustrate this and other common picture book errors she described in her talk. I finished the poem on the flight home, and got it to a final draft soon thereafter.<\/p>\n

Here it is, for your enjoyment and enlightenment:<\/p>\n

How To Write A Picture Book Without Really Trying<\/strong><\/p>\n

Anthropomorphic Alliterative Animals \u2013 in Rhyme!
\nThey\u2019re having such a lovely time,<\/p>\n

All gathered \u2019round the Cute Name Pond,
\nIn bright, sunshiny colors donned.<\/p>\n

(These backward sentences you\u2019ll love;
\nThe hand they fit into the glove.<\/p>\n

And don\u2019t forget those filler words;
\nThey do complete what might be heard.)<\/p>\n

Now meet\u00a0 the talking, scheming zoo,
\nWhose hijinks hanker to ensue:<\/p>\n

Harry Hippo\u2019s cheerful girth
\nIs grist for Milt the Monkey\u2019s mirth.<\/p>\n

And wise old Ollie Owl inveighs
\n\u2019gainst Derwood Donkey\u2019s stubborn ways.<\/p>\n

There\u2019s Roy Raccoon and Sly the Snake
\nAnd Carl the Cow. (Eating a steak???)<\/p>\n

Just pick a name and name a kind,
\nAnd do your best to make it rhyme.<\/p>\n

Soundly beat that metric drum.
\n(Here\u2019s how it goes: da-DUM, da-DUM.)<\/p>\n

And soon, your book will write itself:
\nFrom pen to post to bookstore shelf!<\/p>\n

So get to work. No more delays!
\nIt\u2019s simple as your A-A-A\u2019s.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My parody of all bad picture book texts.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[15,18],"class_list":["post-11","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-my-writing","tag-picture-books","tag-scbwi"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.authorfreeman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.authorfreeman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.authorfreeman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.authorfreeman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.authorfreeman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.authorfreeman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.authorfreeman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.authorfreeman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.authorfreeman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}